I'm slowly getting back into our normal routine.
Doing things for the first time always seems to be the most difficult.
This week I had an appointment at my OB's office.
It was my first time in the office since the horrible ultrasound.
It was my first time back through the hospital doors since we left empty handed.
I was crying before we even turned into the parking lot.
This week I dropped Brady off at school and picked him up - all by myself.
The first pick up I had to tell another mom from a different class about Naomi.
She was kind to ask about the baby in the first place.
I just haven't found a good way to say -
the baby died, the baby didn't make it, she was stillborn.
It's just so shocking for people to hear.
The next day the same sweet mom brought me a beautiful hand-stitched journal.
Just another example of how much love and kindness we are experiencing.
Yesterday I held a baby for the first time since I held Naomi for the last.
He is one of the happiest little guys ever.
Brady and Sammy were so sweet with him - giving him gentle hugs and touches like we talked about for the last 9 months.
It turned my heart into mush and broke it at the same time.
They are supposed to have a little sister to do all those things with.
The first time is always the hardest.
